Lemons into Lemonade

There are many times that I have wondered, WHY ME, WHY NOW, WHY THIS, WHY THAT. I kept asking why and never really heard an answer. Was it that I was possibly not looking at what I needed to at that very moment, instead of living in the moment, I was looking for answers that were not evident. Maybe it was me, trying to get out of the moment, not being willing to feel the feelings and walk through the pain and growth that was in front of me. Maybe the answers were actually sitting right in front of me, they were just not the ones I wanted or that they were not as prominent that I believed they should be.

There is a saying that I have heard in the past year and I really enjoyed hearing this - now that is - when life throws you lemons make lemonade!!

In the past year, I felt alot of betrayal and with that comes alot of pain and hurt. Walking through that pain and hurt is not something that I really ever imagined!! The simple fact that the betrayal would actually occur to me and the other fact that the feelings that came with that were sooo profound that I did not realize that one could live through them.

I am here to tell you that no matter what type of betrayal one is handed in life, the pain is inevitable and the misery, my friend, is optional. It is up to you to do with the pain what you need to and turn it into lemonade.

This, is not a an easy thing to. For the simple fact that living in fear is very paralyzing. To be completely in denial of the pain is much easier and simpler, yet, the simple fact that - walking through all of it - is that you will grow and become a much better soul and also like yourself much more if you walk through it!!

The pain that I felt in the past year, was unimaginable to me. I have had to deal with pain, and not medicating it on a daily basis. Yet, I can say that I would not face it all head on. I would put it off to the side, or not deal with it at that moment. In time I realized that pushing it to the side, only stunted my growth as a human being. The pain, that I felt before this year, had to be dealt with so that I had enough room in my soul to feel this pain and to walk through it.

I have been walking through it and not turning back, last night was another path through the pain that I was given and took. I walked into the pain, into the betrayal, into the lives of those around me that knew the entirety of the situation and I chose to walk the path and face the situation and not hide. For me to hide and run seems to be an easy road. That road, I did not chose last night I chose the road less traveled for me. To my surprise, it felt amazing!!! It felt awesome to be me and to be around those that did love me. It reminded me that I was not the one that needs to run away, it reminded me that I have become a beautiful woman with alot of integrity and strength and that I should not hide me. I need to be out in the open with the world and share who I am and what I have been through.

Last night, was another part of the lemonade and I believe that it tastes AWESOME!!!

How did you deal with the lemons??